A few days ago, it was worlds men’s day and we celebrated men around the world. I saw a post that made me raise my eyebrows in fascination. Or maybe one of them. It said that to be a real man is to face mistakes, learn to love, learn to forgive and to try to be there for everyone who needs you. And I remember thinking to myself how much responsibility that is. Man am I glad that I am not a man. you guys have struggles I am certain we shall never find out about.
So, this is a shout out to all men out there who are struggling to ensure that bread is buttered. Men who go to work to follow execute orders from fellow men who might not be the best of human beings. Here is to men who lead households and always try to keep a strong front even when their center is no longer holding. This is for all the men who always take the high road in the case of an argument with their girlfriends or wives; because a happy woman is a happy home.
Here is to men who are currently dealing with rejection and do not remember the last time someone, or anyone said yes. This is to men who are heroes but do not wear capes. Here is to Boaz Wabwile, a good friend of mine who quickly whipped up something for me because we would have no post for today. He is a funny writer, this one. I laughed hapa na pale as I was editing his article. So … guys, meet Boaz. Boaz, meet the guys.
HIS STORY BEGINS HERE.
“Get me the papers from the printer!”
“Scan that document for me!”
“Can you go to the bank? Never mind, just go and make sure you come back early for the afternoon meeting!”
Sounds familiar? No? Then you ain’t Kenyan. Maybe you are. Not the real one though. Let’s skip that.
Fast forward. What does it take to be a successful entrepreneur? I badly need lessons, sigh. Ever since I took an interest in success stories, I have come to define success in more ways than one. I’ll talk about some of them here;
1. Dropping out of school to start something you like
This is the most interesting. Does it work in Kenya? I once tried that in high school but the whooping that I got was enough to make me suffer and maybe die for the sins of you sinners. My Principal then wouldn’t let me “throw my life away” and my parents would hear nothing to do with success without school.
Who doesn’t know that while some parents were grabbing land and going through school others were busy following missionaries left, right and center as altar boys and being contented with what they got. They probably forgot that family planning then was a dream come true and that the vast 5 acre piece donated by the elders was to be shared among 30 grandchildren. Haha. Joke on you. Sorry. Us.
Nowadays we hide behind Twitter criticizing the sons, and granddaughter, of Jomo for being born in a rich family. What if tables were turned? Would we turn against our families to live an honest life. I know I would. (If I was acting in some movie somewhere of course. I would probably marry our poor maid’s daughter of course. Then I would argue with dad about my choice but I would win in the end)
ALSO READ; DO I LET HIM GO? HE IS SO NEAR YET FAR AWAY.
I once tried gambling, sports betting to be precise (of course I cant afford the others) but it seems it wasn’t my thing. One time, I won some paltry 5000 after spending days on end losing money by the day. I can almost swear I used more than 7,599 if exaggeration of approximate amounts is anything to go by. I had a “master bettor” see what I did there who always said they had sure bets only to end up crying foul about some player who wasn’t supposed to play in some list match that was supposed to be won. Trash talk.
Betting aside, I don’t even get texts from rich white asians and Americans telling me to pick their stuff at the border because of border challenges. Or these rich mamas who are financially stable and looking for a guy to settle with. Kwani they don’t think I can be like Emmanuel Macron? Anyway. that doesn’t work for me either.
Last week I tried calling some radio station to guess the sound of a hen in order to win cash prices but they never picked up. Maybe it was just a ploy to milk the little airtime saved up for my girlfriend later that night. Okay, I don’t have one, doesn’t mean I can’t get one with that airtime? And stop judging. Your spouse is not loyal.
(Lifts my head to indicate that my ears are actually working)
“Umemaliza kudraft zile minutes za meeting ya jana?”
(Have you drafted yesterday’s meeting minutes?)
I don’t remember if I was the secretary but I got to do this My lunch break is over. And this is what we do during the break. Drink water. Surf the web lightly to avoid raising concern on internet usage. Watch other people eat. Wish we were them. And wait for our internship to be over so that we can “nourish” or “furnish” our work experience part on the CV.